What do you imagine when you hear the word “MAN”? Probably not just a man alone but a strong man with huge muscles, well dressed, chin up, facing straight and tough from inside. However, we all imagine man as an overpowered and dominating figure. That’s the masculinity we think about.
The concept of masculinity changes itself into “toxic masculinity” when we start expecting the traits of a strong man to apply to every man. The role of patriarchy in shaping this toxic myth of masculinity and gender stereotyping cannot be ignored. Men, too, suffer from patriarchal clutches.
Men are told at every phase in their life ‘be a man’, from fall on cricket ground to fall in life, from heartbreak to broken marriage. Little do they realise that ‘being a man’ for them means an emotionless body that feels nothing inside out. This toxicity of thoughts has led society to think of an idle man having a tough soul and body, fighting with everything silently unless they win at any cost.
But what if a man cries? What if his words break while expressing himself? What if he can’t bear the pain? What if he is nervous while expressing his love to the person he loves or can’t withstand a heartbreak? What if his shoulders hurt with tons of responsibility? ‘Hey! You aren’t supposed to behave like women, be a man’.
The truth is gender distinction should be limited to filling in the column of gender, but people made it unnecessarily a broad, vague and varied concept. ‘Women can’t be stronger than men’ and ‘Men shouldn’t behave like a woman’ are just concepts made by humans themselves. This common misconception has led to the origin of toxic masculinity, wherein a man is expected to be as tough as a man of people’s imagination.
A man is thought to be strong physically and should have the formidable mental strength to cope with any life situation. But unfortunately, this state of mind has given birth to a new psychological problem. The males who can’t compete to the extent of expectations made by society are anxious and depressed.
This problem worsens when they can’t communicate their dark side with their fellow people. If they did, they would be ridiculed, labelled as weak and told to “BE A MAN”. It’s time we realise that emotional and physical strength doesn’t make you a man.
You are human first, too, with the power of your character. So next time you see a ‘man’ not being a so-called ‘man’, support him rather than pouring toxic masculinist pressure over his overly burdened shoulders. Be a human: an empathetic one.