Depth Or Not, “Gehraiyaan” Offers Some Important Psychological Takeaways

The movie’s name flashes Deepika Padukone, Siddhant Chaturvedi and Ananya Pandey due to the social media promotional campaign the movie producers and director ran across. Many movie reviewers, people on the internet and the janta (citizens) have said a lot about the movie forming a divided acceptance regarding the movie.

As a psychologist, I can surely comment that the movie shows no dirty game of infidelity or too much sexual activity and is preaching to India’s young and old population. But unfortunately, the media lacks to appreciate the duality it strives on and has become highly critical.

We understand that the media tells stories or describes phenomena happening around the community or in society. Also, some topics are uncomfortable to portray, but their prevalence is so much in society that sometimes it becomes overwhelming and necessary to talk about it. If this is a convenient way to shed light on topics of importance, then so be it and let conversations begin somewhere.

I am not a great fan of the movie, but some discussions from a psychological standpoint were explained beautifully throughout the movie. Here’s my list of those things which I found pretty well explained to start conversations:

Mishaps Of Adulting

Our lives pass through stages of development where each stage is dedicated to learning a thing or two specifics during the said time. Throughout these stages, with potential exposure to social and physical environments and experiences, we craft our personalities and determine how we want to design our lives.

Many movies have talked about the academic pressure and the high number of deaths by suicides or attempts to suicide as a coping mechanism to deal with the high amounting stress. But, little we put light on families where academics become a sign of relief and an active mechanism to leave the current status of life and become successful.

The odds are celebrated, and frauds are highly criticised. But does the transition to adulting is as smooth? There are so many reasons a person chooses a particular career or hangs on to a job for a long time, as these things have been set as idioms of success or financial stability.

Funny instance to share, with me too, my extended family insulted me for getting low marks in school. I was a gifted child, but with the kind of schooling, bullying and home environment, as a child, I was never able to strive. Today, I am vocal and have done so much to be pinpointed as successful, but am I financially stable or prosperous? A big existential question.

Thus, adulting is a crucial process that has its challenges. A lot depends on what has been learnt and gathered over some time. Thus, it’s not smooth, and it cannot be perfectly enacted from your hero’s life.

Giving up isn’t a solution and becoming toxic too or ignorant for that matter. It’s alright to seek therapy and learn and discover the capabilities you never knew you had.

Lack Of Meaningful Communication And Relationships

Sticking with the same person for years together doesn’t necessarily mean that you have a beautiful relationship or purposeful communication with the person. It can be because the person has attachment issues or is guilty of prioritising oneself through the duration of the treatment of the relationship.

During the excessive demand and convenient living with hustle culture, positively toxic comments and advice are thrown away casually, and no one has time to sit and listen. Yes, listen to other people’s problems or hold effective conversations.

This makes the communication and relationships stuck and toxic. In that too, there’s an excessive competition to be the best out of the lot. This leads to increased aggressive tendencies and a lack of understanding. Essential communication today is written off as unwanted and catastrophic.

This usually pressures the person to be attracted to something new instantly without evaluating the emptiness or shallowness of the same. This then invites holding too many wasteful friendships and feeding toxicology. Also, infidelities are usually on the holding sexual involvement.

Generational Trauma

Usually, psychologists have focused excessively on putting the parenting styles and mannerisms to perfect stance. This is good, but today we hugely debate individual trauma, usually because of parents and home environment.

I have heard stories of clients who are almost stuck with their parents and have no living space to themselves. This is a very distressing situation and requires a lot of contemplation.

We usually talk of glass being half empty, half-full perspective. But imagine, if our parents have their glasses full of traumatic stress and experiences, how will they fill the new glasses? The new experiences formations, however positive and intentions are good, there will be some drop of insecurity, fear, trust imbalance etc. Making the glass water stale, with different intensities.

This poses a big question and thought to ponder that before unknowingly blaming and throwing off statements, it’s important to respect and acknowledge the experiences of all individuals. Even convince them for therapy or reach out for help.

As they call it, modern living calls for a lot of patience that nobody is prepared for. It demands time, space, communication, commitment, compassion, compatibility, and constant change interaction. An individual needs to grow, but that doesn’t necessarily mean growing out of trauma.

Thus respecting each other is very important. It also means reaching out for psychological help and practising well-being. Being cool and quoting some innovative minds won’t make you that! It might hit off initially but needs to be accessed.