Are you still connected with any of your teachers, or remember your parents having a positive relationship with your teachers?
I recall, my parents never had a good relationship with any of my teachers because they never felt the need for it, or my teachers seldom initiated it. They always think that teachers can never be partners. Instead, power dynamics prevailed in the setting.
Let me tell you a story! When I was in school, my mother came for a parent-teacher meeting (yes, that one dreaded day when we didn’t want to go to school at all). When she entered the classroom, my teacher barely recognized her because she had never met my teacher before (I was in the sixth standard at that time). My teacher told my mother that I don’t ask any questions in the class, which means I understand everything or nothing. My mother did not pay attention, signed on the sheet, and got me back home. I was happy that she did not scold me in front of my classmates, but I heard her saying to my father that she did not like how my teacher spoke to her. She felt that the teacher was quick to judge me. After that meeting with my mother, my teacher never asked me if I understood everything in the class and never talked about me to my parents.
When I think about this instance, I realize that my parents and teacher never tried to build a positive relationship, which in turn affected my relationship with my teacher. This instance has affected me in a way that I fear asking questions and favors even now (when I am a 20-year-old adult), which is very problematic. After all, I lose on opportunities that I might have got. Sigmund Freud (founding father of psychoanalysis) believes that our good and bad experience (including attentions, neglect, comfort, and violence) significantly influences our adult lives. Similarly, Urie Bronfenbrenner’s (an American developmental psychologist) ecological systems theory considers parents and teachers in the microsystem (groups that immediately or directly impact a child’s development). How are these two connected? If parents and teachers have a positive relationship, it will positively impact the child’s development. A comforting and nurturing environment is essential for a child’s life. Now you must be thinking that “what can we do then?” Let’s get into that.
What can Parents do?
- Establish a positive relationship with the teacher.
- Share and plan with the teacher about the child’s development.
- Repeat activities at home that the teacher is conducting at school.
- Participate in activities and events at the school organized for you and the rest of the family members.
- Respect your child’s abilities and personality.
What can Teachers do?
- Get to know the families of the children. Learn how to communicate with diverse families.
- Start building a positive relationship with the parents at the start of the academic year and provide a comfortable environment.
- Make a plan that will help you build positive partnerships with parents.
- Build positive communication with the parents to share progress reports, hold conferences, send personal notes and update parents about events and activities.
- Share ideas about how parents can work with children at home.
- Stay connected and be available to the parents and families for help and support.
- Organize events and activities for parents.
- Seek feedback from parents for improvements and progress checks.
- Send child’s work at home for parents and family members to look and see what the child is doing.
- Encourage parents to volunteer and conduct activities in the class.
Taking these small yet significant steps mentioned above into action will ensure positive outcomes for the child, the parents, and the teachers.
I hope this helps you and do share your experiences.