We give ourselves such a hard time. We are much harder on ourselves than we are on others. When our friends make mistakes, big or small, we offer them support and comfort. But rarely do we show ourselves the same understanding.
It’s easy to think your mistakes are bigger or dumber than anyone else’s. When a friend tries to reassure you by saying they have made a similar mistake, you might automatically assume yours is worse.
When you give yourself a break, you don’t want to abandon self-control or self-observation. It is always important to think about your actions and examine the way you treat others. You want to be mindful of how you perform your everyday tasks and responsibilities and you certainly don’t want to go around hurting people and not taking care of things you are responsible for.
However, self-observation is very different from self-judgment. Observation is objective and is necessary for learning; judgment is negative, and negativity never makes a difficult situation better. When you beat yourself up for something you have done, no good comes from it.
Giving yourself a break simply means not punishing yourself again and again for the same mistakes. When you obsess over something you did that you now regret or when you hate yourself for a problem you have, you make it that much harder to heal and move on. When you choose to take action instead of just feeling guilty, you will see positive changes in your life.
It is also important to do things that help you relax and let go of the stresses that build up each day. Being a teen today means you are under a lot of pressure to achieve, get good grades, get into a good college, make and keep friends and much more.
Then there are all the things you are under pressure not to do. It is very important to take out time in your day and give yourself a break from whatever stresses you out.
When I asked my friends what things they do to give themselves a break, the most common answers were: “listen to music,” “talk to friends”, and simply “retreat to my bedroom”. Whatever it is that helps you relax, be sure to do it every day. This is one very important way to begin being a friend to yourself.
If you feel “burnout” setting in, if you feel demoralized and exhausted, it is best, for the sake of everyone, to withdraw and restore yourself.