Off late we had very disturbing Instagram chats shared via social media of “bois locker room”. A lot of people have given their opinions about them, ranted on social media and news channel debates but hardly anyone speaks of the root cause of the problem. The only method of solving a problem is to assess the root cause, accept the problem, and then work on it.
Let’s talk about Personality. What creates a personality? Personality can be summed up as a combination of characteristics or qualities that form an individual’s distinctive character. How is it influenced? It is influenced by the society we live in, nature around us, nurturing of parents, and the person’s exposure to media and his social circle.
Now, what would have led boys between the age of 14-18 to share photos and body shame girls of their age, treat them as objects to the extent that they think of raping them! Such thinking of a teenager is very dangerous for society. Especially for a country like India where 65% of the population is under 30. What causes such thinking? According to me, these are as follows:
1. Exposure to Media:
Just like our physique is a result of what we eat, our personality and thinking is the sum of all the media we consume. Be it the books we read, the shows, movies, and even the music we listen to. It is very important to know what is part of our “mental diet”. In the Advertisement industry, ads that run the most usually emphasize sex appeal or emotional appeal. Excessive use of sex appeal could also be seen in the Music and Entertainment industry, especially in the recent online web series. Desperate Youtubers use vulgar/ sexual content as clickbait. We have movies and songs that openly objectify women and whenever such an act happens we take it in jest saying oh that’s just for entertainment. Hardly do we realize how deep impact does it put on society.
2. Pornography:
Ted Bundy, was one of the most dreaded rapists and psycho killers the US had ever seen. He openly said in his last interview before being executed that his crimes should be a warning of the dangers of pornography, he said his addiction to hardcore pornography was one of the reasons that led him to commit such heinous crimes. There have been numerous researches that exhibit that porn watching is addictive just like any other drug and has serious effects on mental health.
Some might say that it is the source of sex education and is just natural for a teen to indulge in to release stress. Please do your research, it’s not sex education at all, and there are better ways to release that “stress”. Most of the rapists and sexual offenders are found to be hardcore violent porn addicts. Unfortunately, we are amongst the top countries with porn viewership. It’s a billion-dollar industry that doesn’t care about you. But we can surely spread the message?
3. Social Structure and Family
The social structure of an individual plays the most important role in the formation of a youth’s personality, especially in the teenage years. The people he talks to, teachers, family members, friends, and even the social media stars and celebrities one follow play an important role.
It should be the responsibility of parents to guide them through the teen years. They should know what their child is up to and know well about his social circle. The motive is not to police them, but to guide them towards the right path. They should always be available for them, make them indulge in productive activities, inculcate moral values, and help them grow as a person.
4. Sex Education
It is quite unfortunate that we are the world’s 2nd largest population and still we hush while talking about sex. More unfortunate being that children often get to know about it from the wrong sources and that’s what leads to the problem. Parents must ensure that they talk about it openly before they learn it from the wrong sources. Schools also have a major responsibility in this.
Combating such a mentality takes a collective effort of the society as a whole, and that happens by talking about it! No more brushing things under the carpet. People reading this article might think, oh what can I do about it? How can I do my part? Well, you can guide your younger siblings, friends, and acquaintances!
You can even share this article with the maximum number of people you know so that the message is well spread across people. Your one share might bring a huge difference in someone’s life. We all have a collective responsibility in ensuring that such instances are not repeated again and our youth is inclined in the right direction.