During these 16 Days of Activism against gender-based violence, take some time out to think about these 16 ways in which we can tackle violence in our daily lives. If violence is taking place all around us in so many forms, then why not start here and now?
1. Listen
If history has shown us anything, it is that everyone else claims to know more about women, than women themselves. If you really want to know what women are trying to say, stop yapping about it and just listen!
2. Surprise! You’re Not The Centre Of The Universe
Since we live in a patriarchal society, men are often made to believe that they are the centre of the universe. If even for a moment, we could all stop thinking like this, it would be a lot easier to understand women’s agency and freedom.
3. Reflect
Sometimes, people won’t like you back. And that’s okay. So instead of being destructive, and throwing tantrums about getting rejected, it’s good to sit back, relax and reflect. Give yourself the time you need to move forward from it.
4. Repeat After Me: No Means No
And say it again! It’s no secret that women’s agency and consent is still not understood and acknowledged. Not understanding consent has led to widespread sexual violence and abuse against women, and it is high time that men learn that NO MEANS NO!
5. It’s Not Dokha; It’s You
This is so important, we have to put it here twice! It’s common to fear betrayal (dhokha) but what a lot of men fail to realise is that the emotions of resentment that this fear brings are a byproduct of entitlement, that comes from patriarchy, which for ages has had some sort of control over women’s bodies and sexuality.
6. Stop Talking
Stalking is a very serious problem that women face which makes public and cyberspaces unsafe for them and restricts their mobility. If men stop obsessing over where women are going and who they are talking with, it’ll be one less thing women have to worry about. Also, for those who did not know, Stalking is illegal!
7. Do Not Define Women By The Men Around Them
It is very common practice for women to be defined as someone’s wife, sister, mother, and so on. Men are still placed at the centre of women’s identities instead of their own achievements.
8. Find Better Role Models
There is way too much testosterone-driven masculinity (*cough* Kabir Singh *cough*) in popular culture that appropriates violent behaviour. So, let’s broaden our horizons and find better people to look up to and learn something from.
9. Don’t Mansplain
10. Take Responsibility For Your Actions
Allegations of violence against women are often met with defensive behaviour and shifting blame. Blaming alcohol or other circumstances for any kind of violence actually justifies the perpetrators and misplaces the conversation
11. Think Of Better Jokes
Inappropriate humour, especially at the workplace that stereotypes people’s identities and bodies are not funny, but hurtful. Verbal abuse and harassment are also forms of violence that many people, especially women, and gender-nonconforming people, face regularly. Instead of saying “Just Kidding”, just think of better jokes.
12. Believe
Women’s accounts of facing various forms of violence have been and still is discredited and dismissed across the globe. It is very crucial that we BELIEVE them if we ever want to eliminate all violence against women.
13. End Victim Blaming
Blaming survivors of violence for what they go through, is very often, the first response. Women are not asking for it and saying so only perpetuates an endless cycle of violence.
14. Do Not Expect A Medal
The expectation of gender-sensitive behaviour is so low, that whenever a man does the bare minimum (like not being violent, sharing work at home or just not objectifying women), they feel the need to be applauded and praised. So how about, after following all these steps, don’t ruin it and just sit down!
15. Take A Stand
Violence against women perpetuates because people don’t speak up against it enough. From language to microaggressions, acts of violence go unchallenged in all our lives. So, calling out what’s wrong is essential.
16. Don’t Stop Here
