Causes Of Teenage Suicide: What Parents Need To Know

*Trigger Warning*

On the night of October 7, 2005, the lives of Peter D’Souza and Elizabeth D’Souza were changed forever when they discovered that their thirteen-year-old son, Kevin had committed suicide by hanging.

Traumatised by the horrific and tragic situation they’d been thrown into, the parents of Kevin searched desperately for answers as to why their son would feel so lost, that he felt suicide was his only option.

Kevin had been described as a lovely child, who was able to always make people smile. Why such a sweet and happy seeming child would commit suicide, was a huge mystery to everyone.

And here’s the truth, the bitter narration which will leave you all with a bitter taste. Kevin was a victim of intense bullying from his schoolmates leading him to confess a fear of going back to school. His parents advocated the seemingly-reasonable approach of talking to the principal, an idea opposed by Kevin who feared it would make matters worse. However, unbeknownst to his parents, the bullying continued. Comments were made about his sexuality and even his close friends joined in telling others he was no less than a joker. It was ultimately too much for Kevin to bear and he killed himself at the tender age of thirteen.

There was yet another case of a young teenage girl taking her life after being a victim of cyberbullying. She was found hanging in her bedroom by her sister with the legs dangling and the ghastly eyes open. The teenager who was once a very bubbly girl fell prey to a sick mind who abused her online. Hidden behind a mask of anonymity, the sick predator attacked this vulnerable teenager to the extent she took her own life.

Bekon Smith committed suicide by walking into the path of a truck. Prior to the incident, she had scheduled a post on her public Tumbler page to go live after her death. In her final message, Bekon stated: “My death has to mean something”. She wrote about her struggles as a young transgender teen, detailing her wish to live as a woman with her parents, who had denied her request, claiming it to be an insult to God.

The post broke the hearts of thousands of readers, who actively shared the message in order to publicise the tragedy. After her death, Bekon’s mother still refused to use female pronouns for her daughter and would only refer to her by her given name of Bekon. She also refused to allow Bekon’s best friend, who had supported her decision to live as a woman, to attend the funeral.

The above case studies are our attempt to raise awareness on the issue of suicide of children and teens.

Suicide is a difficult subject to address. There are far too many tragic stories of people who felt the only way to escape their troubles was to take their own lives. When the people at the centre of these events are children, the dreadful emotions we feel are amplified.

Common Reasons For Suicide In Children And Teens Include:

1. Stress: You heard me right. The stress factor triggers suicidal tendencies in teens and children. It may be bullying in school, break up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, divorce of parents, major dissension at home and a whole host of reasons. The teen/child might turn suicidal or show signs of hurting himself/herself. So dear parents, now it is your job to keep an eye on your child and take him/her under your confidence. Assure and counsel the child, rather than thinking that the child is trying to play pranks. Do not ignore the child. The child needs help and is not seeking attention at all. The result can be fatal. This is an initial warning.
2. Mental Health: Keep a sharp watch on your child to look for signs of depression such as withdrawal from normal activities. Understand the gravity of the medical afflictions in the mental health sector – depression, bipolar, anxiety, schizophrenia and many more. Your child may be a victim of bullying. Keep a proper communication channel open with children. Seek professional help when needed.
3. Difficulty dealing with the situation: In an interview conducted with teens about making suicide attempts, they actually confessed a difficulty dealing with the situation. Suicide seemed the easy way out and we all know how wrong this notion is! Parents need to teach their child how to deal with challenging situations. That can only happen once your communication channel is very clear with your child.
4. Your relationship with the child: It might sound like repetition but I would like to reiterate that each parent should maintain a healthy relationship with his/her child. The more hostile you appear, the more the child will be bound to recoil and shield himself/herself in a cocoon ultimately making them suicidal. Be more like a friend rather than a dominant parent.
5. Environment – An abusive environment can trigger suicidal feelings in a child.
6. Avoid discussing death – Often parents discuss death; suicide etc. in front of children; what they don’t realize is that it can create a deep impact on the immature mind. Do not discuss these dark topics in front of the child/teen. They are too young and vulnerable to understand. The child might think of it as fun and even before you realize the child is gone.

Please raise awareness. Stop suicide among children and teens. You won’t realize how it feels to be sad every single day without your child even when you experience joy. It’s the goodbyes which hurt the most when the stories aren’t finished. You as a parent will never understand until it happens with you. It’s the child you will miss when you are breathing.

Save a child, save the Nation. Make the world a better place to live. Prevent suicide.

Note: These are case studies, the name changed to protect the identity

A different version was first published here.