Love Matters asked women what worked better for their pleasure meter – masturbation or sex with a partner. Here’s what they had to say.
The Grass Is Greener There
“I masturbate. Through it, I orgasm sometimes and other times, I don’t. I haven’t experienced sex with a partner yet. From what I gather about sex through others’ experiences, I feel it’s obviously better than masturbation.”
-Lipika, 24, civil-services aspirant
“I don’t really masturbate, I have not explored it much. I tried but realised it wasn’t really my thing. Also, I’ve been in a relationship since I was very young, so I didn’t feel the need to masturbate. I’ve experienced sex with my boyfriend and have orgasmed, obviously.”
-Ramona, 21, student
Who Knows
“I haven’t tried masturbation or sex. I have a partner and we keep talking about trying to have sex sometimes. From what I have heard about both these options, I feel sex with a partner is obviously better.”
-Abhivyakti, 19, student
Who Needs A Partner
“Masturbation? No. I don’t have time for such things. Majority of my friends who masturbate enjoy it quite a lot though, and after masturbating, they don’t feel the need for a partner! I can’t say about masturbation for myself though. I have kissed and made out with my previous boyfriend and I climaxed through that.”
-Minisha, 25, research analyst
No Idea
“I don’t masturbate because I have a husband. I am married. I’ve experienced sex, yes.”
(Do you orgasm through sex with your partner?) *pauses* “I have no idea.” (laughs and walks away)
-Suneeta, 28, hostess at a restaurant
The Feelings
“I have neither masturbated nor had sex with anyone yet. From the experiences of women around, I felt sex will be more pleasurable because there are more feelings involved there. Khud se khud ka (one your own) is not that much fun, I feel.”
-Manisha, 18, student
Fingering It Out
“I’ve tried masturbating but I’m not sure how it is done. However, I did manage to hit some spots that gave pleasure. In fact, I tried masturbating only after exploring sexually with my partner, he helped me figure myself out there.”
“I’ve just started my sexual life and hence, I haven’t explored much yet. I run away before reaching orgasm fearing I might squirt or something. Masturbation has never been very satisfying. Sex and fingering (by partner) have been.”
-Shivali, 26, social worker
Self-service Is The Best
“I discovered masturbation quite late in life – in my early 20s — and the process of figuring out what works for me was as gradual as it can get. But it’s been my best self-discovery. I have far and few sexual interactions and I always find myself comparing the quality of pleasure from sex to what I get from masturbation, which is so much better.”
“No partner has ever made me orgasm and I always orgasm when I masturbate.”
-Reshma, 27, graphic designer
Porn And Masturbation
“I often masturbate while watching porn. I know maybe I am one of the few women who love watching porn and masturbating because, from what I know, most men do so. I also ask my partner to watch porn with me so that we both can masturbate and get off. It’s the most wonderful orgasm that I get when I masturbate. Having sex does not give me orgasm. It never did.”
-Nitika, 29, content writer
My Girl Is The Best
“I am a bisexual and now in a committed relationship with a girl. I must say that I orgasm with her much more easily while making out, as compared to my ex-boyfriend. She knows exactly what spots to hit and how to touch my clit. Orgasm with her is so much better that I do not indulge in masturbation much now.”
-Gauri, 26, call centre executive
*To protect the identity, names have been changed.
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Featured Image for representative purpose only.