Like every other student, looking for an internship with ‘priceless experience’ and a resume worthy certificate, I applied for the position of writer at Campus Watch, a vertical wing within Youth Ki Awaaz. After all, this was my chance, both literally and metaphorically because “you are supposed to grind in your second year and do as many internships as you possibly can.”
Though now that I’m thinking about this dreadful piece that I’ve been avoiding to write, it is better to come out about it as honestly as I can. This internship was one of the best options for my narcissistic self to flaunt that I am a literature major with a deep interest in writing. It was also a way to explore a journalistic side of writing which was different from my usual experience of academic writing.
Unfortunately, I committed a huge mistake by ‘applying.’
No, don’t get me wrong, the experience wasn’t bad, it was excellent as I’ll explain in the coming paragraphs, but it was my confidence that was shattered. I applied for the internship with a satirical piece on #NotAllMen, comparing them to Modi government and consequently clearing my stand on both the topics. I didn’t receive a call or any written response whatsoever, and began thinking that something was wrong with my piece or maybe my writing was not actually of the level they required.
Some days later, I received a request for a telephonic interview and later I got selected, another mistake. This was a mistake because it was a blow to my narcissistic ego. It was a journey from a self-declared writer to a beginner. The more I wrote, the more I realised my mistakes, the more I learnt.
So, I began with a piece critiquing contemporary coffee culture in colleges and here I am, ending with a criticism of my own self. As much as this journey has been an external one with multiple pieces on campuses, protests, events, politics, environment, and culture, this has been a beautiful internal journey as well. In each piece that I wrote, there was a piece of myself. An integral piece, not in terms of my time spent, but an introspective autobiographical journey within. Each piece was a way to analyse my knowledge, opinions, stance and how I’ll proceed with my actions.
This is difficult. Perhaps the most difficult piece that I’ve written for Youth Ki Awaaz. Solely because I’ve got the most troublesome work of looking back and analysing and summing up my journey. In all my previous journeys, there was solace because there wasn’t a piece like this, but now I am sitting here writing something that I’ll probably use in my autobiography, if I write one.
My Campus Watch journey has been full of bumps and wild rides. I remember a piece in my initial time where my personal opinion was completely different from what others thought. I had to edit my piece multiple times, trying to put my narrative right, but succeeded at last. This was a personal victory for me as I was able to present a completely unbiased yet informative picture on a highly politicised topic.
I remember another piece wherein I was allowed to attend a protest which I would have passed otherwise. I remember the rush that I got while interviewing teachers and professors; I remember the slogans, the environment and the thrill of that protest, the thunderous sound of those cries, all of it made me feel that I was a part of it. It was truly an unforgettable experience.
Then there are some of my babies, my gems, the pieces I cherish the most. Most of them were either satire or criticism and it was an honour to receive appreciation for them. In a world where people have stopped reading, people took the pain to understand my satire and this was all the validation I needed as a beginner.
I remember my emails which reflected those who started following my writing and others who commented on my posts, striking up important and relevant conversations. This was an accomplishment because unlike Instagram, people here were following me for my writing and not appearance. I made several friends due to these conversations and was actually indulging in an activity that I wholeheartedly loved and believed in.
The journey was not all happy. There were days when I felt massive writer’s block and couldn’t even type a single word. There were days when college kept me so busy that I couldn’t even produce one coherent idea. But, I am thankful to the entire team at Campus Watch, who always understood my problems and planned my writing accordingly.
I don’t have my usual punchlines for this piece, but all that I can offer is genuine gratitude, love, respect and continued support for this beautiful platform and even more beautiful people I have met through it.