Spending a couple of years in India provided me with enough time to reflect on the questions about the possibility of staying away from my homeland or native place. Even when we come from families having the same ethnicity, nationality and religion, we still have different aspects of belongingness. Sometimes, we have to choose which aspect we put first while introducing ourselves.
I think my ideas about belonging to one’s homeland have changed. In fact, I started to think about it while I was living in an African country. The thought process started by questioning what linked me to the place and its people and whether I miss those connections or not. Are they really important or it is only a matter of emotions?
I am sure that I do not miss the official image of my homeland. The image that I had seen. Actually, it is always exciting to think carefully about that image while analysing the patriotic songs that we had listened to in our childhood. When I look at the world map, First, I look at Africa. My eyes trace the thin lines symbolizing rivers and imposed borders around my native town. Sometimes, I expect to identify my home on the map.
I truly miss my mother tongue. This is not only about being fluent in a language but about the close relation that you develop with your culture. With the passage of time, you develop an intuition that one word is more appropriate than the other. Not being able to speak any of the local languages is bound to make you feel vulnerable. I also realized that with success and failure, we tend to find many ways other than language to express our emotions. You do not always require a language to express your feelings. I can say that I have many relationships that are based only on smiles, a few words, and signs. These relationships happen to be far more intimate that normal ones.
I truly miss the small details, the sounds on the streets, and the ‘smell’ of my culture. I think ‘home’ is all about close and genuine relationships with people and the familiarity with your culture and language. These things cannot be fully acquired through reading. One needs a long time to learn them, admire them, and practice them.