Presenting a telephonic job interview scene in the form of a script. Read on –
(A lady with a sexy voice over the phone….)
Lady: Hi! Am I speaking to Mukesh Sharma?
Mukesh: Yes, speaking!
Lady: Hi Mukesh, this is Shubra from XYZ Consultancy. We are actually looking for candidates who are jobless. Are you interested?
Mukesh: In what? Being jobless?!
Lady: No no no! I mean, are you interested to get into a job?
Mukesh: Yeah. Please tell me what it is all about.
Lady: It is about a company called Hopeful Content Services – and they want people who can surpass Shakespeare in English!
Mukesh: Oh yeah, you have dialled the right person, lady! I have seen all the adaptations by Vishal Bhardwaj!
Lady: What? Come again?
Mukesh: Nothing nothing, please carry on!
Lady: Yeah, so if you are interested, can you please mail your resume on our official ID and come for the interview tomorrow?
Mukesh: Yeah I will, but why don’t you first go through my resume and shortlist my name? I mean that is the process, isn’t it?
Lady: Yeah, but we have full faith in you that you will waste your time travelling and in spending the leftover money in order to make your hopeless career!
Mukesh: Well! In that case, I am ready to come for the interview. Please mail me the company’s complete address with the relevant landmark and the time.
Lady: Sure I will, but it will be boring if you find company’s office well before your interview time. You should at least wander for about an hour in search of it, shouldn’t you?
Mukesh: You are a professional consultancy employee, I must say! Sure, I will suffer!
Lady: Great! Best of luck then for your ordeals!
(Mukesh has finally got the address and is now entering the reception area.)
Mukesh: Hey, hi! My name is Mukesh – I am here for an interview.
Receptionist: Oh ok (one more loser). Please be seated and fill this useless form!
Mukesh: Sure, I am jobless. So I will do whatever you say!
(Mukesh waits, waits and waits. And finally the clarion call…)
Receptionist: Mr. Mukesh! It is your turn now – take a left , then a right, then a circle, then a perpendicular – and there, you can see our HR!
Mukesh: Thanks for clearly confusing me!
Receptionist: Oh my pleasure and your pain!
(Mukesh enters the conference room and meets the HR person.)
HR: Hi! You are… Mukesh, right?
Mukesh: Yeah right, Mukesh Sharma!
HR: Right, so tell me about yourself.
Mukesh: I am a graduate in (blah), did my schooling from (blah blah). I am good with languages that you cannot understand. (Blah blah blah… and blah blah blah blah)!
HR: Great! You will be given a test paper which you need to complete by the time our housekeeping staff leave – and then, there is one face-to-face interview which is just a formality! Got it?
Mukesh: Absolutely!
(Mukesh is now finally done with the test and he is going through the face-to-face interview.)
Company Senior: Hi Mukesh, be seated! Well, let me tell you that you have scored good in your test!
Mukesh: Oh ok! Thanks!
Company Senior: But there is a problem…
Mukesh: Oh! And what is it exactly?
Company Senior: See, you are good but not that good to take home a salary – which is more of an insult to you, isn’t it?
Mukesh: Yeah, but then, why did you ask people to pen down their expected salary?
Company Senior: Oh, that is just to play with the figures and mislead you, what else!
Mukesh: Ok, let it be. What is your final call then?
Company Senior: You are a good candidate, but we will let you know!
(Mukesh leaves the office dejected, sad and waits for another call.)
DEAD END