By Cake Staff:
What is asexuality? The question has come up rather often in recent times, shining a spotlight one of the queer spectrum’s lesser known identities. For a long time, people thought the “A” in “LGBTQIA+” stood for “ally.” In fact, American Apparel was even selling a range of tote bags that claimed the same, until asexual social media users demanded they #GiveItBack (the letter “A” that is) and recognize asexuality instead of erasing it.
Forget about major brands, even LGBTQ spaces can be exclusionary when it comes to other end of the acronym. But fortunately, they’re learning to be more welcoming of “a-spectrum” identities like demisexuality, autosexuality, gray-asexuality, aromanticism, and asexuals who may be sex-repulsed, sex-positive or sex-indifferent. But [envoke_twitter_link]we still need loads of effort to amplify asexual voices[/envoke_twitter_link].
So on October 24, the Twitter account @Asexual Pride started the hashtag #AceLife, inviting stories of what it feels like being asexual in a world where sex sells:
Hi folks! Today’s the day to storm Twitter with #AceLife! Share any experiences you’ve had as an asexual with the tag & let’s be heard! ?
— Asexual Pride (@AsexualPride) October 24, 2016
The conversation was part of Asexual Awareness Week, an international campaign that kicked off on October 23. The idea is to break down some of the tired and harmful myths around asexuality, and to educate people about what it is and what it isn’t. It’s also about paying attention to personal experiences, and these Twitter users made good use of the opportunity.
On Coming To Terms With Their Identity:
I didnt realise that what I experienced was aesthetic attraction & not sexual attraction. I was so confused I thought it was a joke #AceLife
— Lauren ?? (@jemcarstvirs) October 24, 2016
Thinking I was Bi because I felt ‘attracted’ to everyone equally. Turns out the amount of attraction for everyone was none #AceLife
— Alex Crook (@AMCrook15) October 24, 2016
For the longest time I thought people had sex only to have kids, the fact that people have sex for fun is still baffling #acelife
— jules (@aroacedragon) October 25, 2016
I thought once I met “the one” I’d want to have sex like everyone else, now I know that’ll never happen & I’m okay with that #Acelife
— Zofi Anderzzon (@ZofiAnderzzon) October 24, 2016
On Being Made To Feel ‘Different’:
#acelife I never realized that my lack of sexual feelings wasn’t normal. I didn’t get how people could meet and start dating so fast.
— Space Ace ?? (@cararock92) October 24, 2016
Said I’m not interested in sex, been asked “Are you suffering from something?” #AceLife
— SUICIDE蟻 (@_Fukurou_) October 24, 2016
On The Need For Ace-Spaces And Representation:
Hard to meet other aces since most queer spaces are sexualized (clubs,etc.) #AceLife https://t.co/eCm0B9jrEC
— Gaby Rivera (@whatisdrawing) October 24, 2016
Being completely invisible even in queer spaces, especially when our letter is given to straight allies ??? #AceLife
— Alex Crook (@AMCrook15) October 24, 2016
Knowing our media repesentation is robots/aliens/murderers & it probably won’t get mentioned in lectures if I don’t bring it up #acelife
— ?Tamar Knott ??? (@TamarKnott) October 24, 2016
On Dating:
#AceLife
Being scared of entering relationships ;_;— ☽⚲⛧noel⛧⚲☾ (@totermonarch) October 24, 2016
And Dealing With Other People’s Lack Of Awareness:
no one irl wants to date you and you regularly get asked if you’re a plant #AceLife ?♠️?♠️
— Ash ? (@sicknastyphresh) October 24, 2016
Having to explain what asexuality is every time I come out #AceLife
— Lauren ?? (@jemcarstvirs) October 24, 2016
But There’s The Funny Side Of Ace Life Too:
Being excited about tennis season because it’s the most you’ll get to hear your sexuality on the TV #acelife
— ?Tamar Knott ??? (@TamarKnott) October 24, 2016
With A Little Bit Of Art Thrown In As Well:
#AceLife pic.twitter.com/BDHACyiGJp
— (((Ido))) (@WerewolfIda) October 24, 2016
All of this has perhaps highlighted a few issues that many in the asexual community have had to face. By turning to social media, the campaign encourages a larger exchange of stories, and with much of the safety and comfort that the internet can provide. We can’t wait to see how the rest of this week plays out, and [envoke_twitter_link]we hope that voices from the ace community only get louder and louder[/envoke_twitter_link] from hereon.